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APYM Gathering 12/6/17- "Standing on Common Ground: Rooted in the Domestic Church" with Tim Janiszewski

12/12/2017

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​December 6, 2017 at St. Joseph, Eldersburg
Introductions, including overview of Servant Team roles
Icebreaker – Rudy led us in a “Secret St. Nick” sharing & game
  • Each person filled out a sheet with the answers to five questions & shared in a table group
  • Everyone pulled a different person’s and chose an imaginary gift for the unknown person (budget $150)
Prayer – Rena – Intercession
  • Began with the Lord’s Prayer (God is a parent – Our Father)
  • Story of St. Nicholas throwing bags of gold coins into home to save 3 daughters’ reputations
  • Gold coin chocolates – for each one, plan an intentional action for a parent or set of parents (in your ministry, parish, community, etc.) & share with the table
  • Shared intentions for prayer
  • Prayed through list of intercessions for parents (document will be linked).
Tim Janisewski (Keynote) – Rooted in the Domestic Church
  • Who Is Tim?
    • Husband of Laura, his high school dream girl (though they never dated in college). Married 22 years, still can’t believe he’s got to marry her.
    • Dad of Luke and Jake.
    • Used to be an engineer, felt a call for “something else” – now in ministry for 21 years.
  • Family Tradition on the Feast of St. Nicholas – Write a letter to Baby Jesus.
    • Two parts:
      1. How did you past year go?
      2. What are your hopes for this upcoming year?
    • When Tim was a kid, the would put them in pie tins outside and St. Nick would come get them and leave a treat. 😊 (Some traditions use shoes.)
  • Everybody’s Domestic Church is different. Some are faithful, some not as much, but they shape all of us in faith one way or another.
    • Shared stories of his parents – His father discerned religious if quite seriously. “If it wasn’t for my dad’s hemorrhoids, I wouldn’t be here.” (seriously – check the video!)
    • Triptych with Our Lady of Czestochowa and feast days Saints for every family member.
    • Dinner by candlelight (I thought everybody did this!)
    • Family Prayer plaque – prayed together as a family at the end of every dinner. I hated it!
    • Family never missed Mass. “We are Janisewskis, we go to Mass.”
    • Father blessed them every night, hand on his children’s heads, with “The Lord bless you and keep you…” Even now, Tim blesses his sons from afar (hands raised pointing in the appropriate direction)
    • Dad’s Motto: In His Will, Our Peace.
    • Dad’s Books – it was normal to have faith books around the house
    • Arch Books – stories of OT and NT, etc. All the pictures from those books became the images for those passages in Tim’s adult life.
    • Mom’s prayer chair – she would sit there in the mornings, with scripture, and the kids knew not to interrupt her.
    • Visits to the Grotto in Emmitsburg.
    • When family would come to visit DC, they always started at the Basilica.
    • Always pray the Rosary during the months of May and October. Tim hated this too! Dad would always chant his parts, which drove brother and sister crazy, so Tim would do it too.
    • Went to Catholic school at St. Jane’s. Dad was an elementary school teacher, Mom was at home (also an elementary school teacher), so it was a stretch but an important part of his faith development.
      1. Some parents see Catholic school as their key to not having to do faith stuff at home, and this doesn’t work!
    • Wait – St. Nick put treats in the pie plates! 😊
    • Advent Wreath
    • Advent Calendar
    • If you do only one thing for Advent, do the Jesse Tree! – He had no idea that he was learning Salvation History every Advent!
    • Nativity Set – hid Baby Jesus until Christmas Day. Mom’s ceramic one was off limits, but there was a wooden one to play with.
    • Tim “was a sadistic weird little kid” and combined Noah’s Ark with the Nativity scene. Jesus and the donkey survived, obviously.
    • Christmas Gifts – small gifts at Christmas, bigger gifts are some other time of the year.
    • Lent – Stations of the Cross at home, with candles. Tim’s Dad made a simple wooden Stations set, w/ only spots for 12 candles, so that when the last candle goes out it lines up with Jesus’ death.
    • Sacrament Cloth – went out on the table for Baptisms and First Communions
    • Did First Communions in their own house!
    • Kids’ bible – “I don’t know if I actually read it, but I definitely looked at the pictures.”
    • Confirmation – no one had the nerve to say that his Dad (who happened to be dying) couldn’t be his sponsor.
    • Dad – “I forgave you before you did it.” (Like Jesus!)
    • Conscience is the most important voice, but it has to be educated.
    • Was this normal??? Likely not, but it wasn’t abnormal in a weird/isolated way.
    • Tim’s Mom, Kay Janisewski, is here!
    • Mom taught him to put his name on things so he can stand by his words (Kellie does it too).
    • At home, Tim’s family celebrates their Baptism days. They get books for each anniversary of Baptism, starting with children’s books.
    • They do family pilgrimages.
 
  • Advice for parents who are nervous or self-conscious:
    • “Anything you do that’s faith related, let them know you do it!!!!”
    • Be vulnerable with your kids! It’s okay to not be perfect.
    • Make the Sign of the Cross on their forehead when you say goodnight.
    • Give them something they can follow, a guide, including conversations about it, and challenge them (give them someone to “blame.”)
    • Kay’s big takeaway/most important thing to pass on to kids: Prayer! In all forms.
    • Tangible, non-intimidating, and concrete suggestions are important for families we minister to/with.
    • Tim’s Advent calendar is his house when the boys were little – notes with actions, which when completed were replaced with special candy. “Live in tune with the Spirit and enjoy the fruits!”
    • From Mary Conney: Blog resources for celebrating faith within the family:
      1. Carrots for Michaelmas
      2. Catholic All Year

 
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APYM Gathering – 9/7/17 – Finding the Common Ground: Meet on their Turf

9/22/2017

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Notes in PDF Form
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St. Paul, Ellicott City
  • Introductions and Housekeeping (Katie Erskine)
  • Icebreaker (Colleen) – Speed Dating (inner/outer circle rotations)
    • What was your favorite youth ministry thing you did this summer?
    • What was your favorite non-ministry thing you did this summer?
    • What is your goal for the next 12 month/within the next 12 months?
  • Prayer (Kate Wyvill/Rudy) – Noticing Those We Fail to Notice
    • Casting Crowns – “Does Anybody Hear Her?”
      • Underline words and write names
    • USCCB Convocation: “We are not the Church serving ‘x group’; we are the Church serving the Church.”
    • Index cards with names of people/groups you don’t normally connect with or haven’t made an effort to get to know
      • Your family
      • Your friend group
      • Your coworkers
      • Your volunteers
      • Teens you work with
      • A community in the parish where you worship
      • A group/community within society
    • Read the Woman at the Well (John 4)
      • Underline words and write names
      • Discuss!
      • If Jesus was sitting at the well with the people on your index cards, what would he say to them? (write on back of index card)
  • Theme for the Year: Common Ground!

  • Shaun Smithson – Maryland State Director of FCA & Texas Native
    • Thank you for the chance to share!
    • Conversation more than a teaching – it has already begun. Our prayer service is the start of this conversation.
    • Story behind the story of the woman at the well is CRITICAL!
      • Jesus is tired and hungry, and his disciples are in town getting food.
      • Disciples return and he’s not hungry anymore and he’s not hungry anymore – he is energized by doing his Father’s will.
      • The townspeople come because of the woman, NOT the disciples. What opportunities to bring people to Christ did they miss while they were completing the task of getting food?
      • How often do we miss opportunities while we’re working – e.g., buying food for an event without even mentioning to the checkout person what it’s for, why we are doing this?!
      • What does God have figured out before we even come to the table? (Does he know who is going to be at the cash register when you check out, or at the table behind you at your important lunch date?)
      • Thoughts about “Does Anybody Hear Her?”
        • A steeple is designed to be seen and heard from far away, but the real Church requires looking more closely.
        • Our response to someone “running away” might instinctually be to yell after them, but the best response to run after them and catch them.
        • It’s about identity.
        • Mark 5:41 – Jesus tries (and succeeds!) with a child whom others said was long gone, and not to bother. Youth pastors do this all the time – try with those who others have disregarded and bring them life. By not giving up on teens, we allow Jesus to work through us.
      • Article – “How Do You Get People to Your Church?” (on the Gospel Coalition website)
        • It’s not about worship style.
        • “Personally, I don’t know very many unbelievers who are likely to attend a church service.”
        • “Thankfully, I have soccer, so I don’t have to go to church [to find community].”
        • Free coffee – Starbucks or making coffee at home is just as easy
        • Branding and social media – we can’t compete
        • Pastor’s funny – yeah, so is Youtube!
        • “If our churches are going to reach people, it will be through reaching each other.”
      • Why don’t they come?
        • They don’t know about it.
        • They’re busy.
        • No one invited them.
        • Seems clique-y.
        • Don’t realize that they’re not fulfilled and that Jesus is the missing piece.
        • No connection or interest, does not appeal (like a hobby you’re just not interested in).
          • Volitional barrier – they just don’t want to!
        • Emotional barriers (baggage from real or imagined hurts, either personal or global – “institutional religion”)
        • Intellectual barriers (from parents, history class, misconceptions, philosophical frameworks)
      • He got into youth ministry in order to introduce kids who didn’t know Jesus to Jesus.
        • But who in your life do you have relationships with who doesn’t know Jesus yet?
        • Luke 19:10 – Zacchaeus – Jesus came to seek and save the lost!
        • God SENT his Son – “sent” means he WENT somewhere!
        • Example: Willow Creek – famous evangelical church all churches were looking for – but the folks in the gas station across town had never heard of it!
        • No one knows about FCA – except where we’ve met them on their turf! Where there are FCA huddles, high schoolers know about FCA, which lends to knowing Christ.
          • FCA is not a “come to” ministry but a “go to” ministry.
        • Getting on their turf is not a strategy. “How do I get them to come to church?” is the wrong question. You have won the minute you get to spend time with the student!
        • HANDOUT (at left)
        • KEYS TO MEETING TEENS ON THEIR TURF:
        • Be partners with their experts.
          • “The most powerful words in the English language are ‘Coach said.’” – Billy Graham
        • The goal should not be the championship at the end of the season (sacrament, etc.), but the relationship.
        • Be interested in them – what are they passionate about?
        • Expect resistance – not just physical or interpersonal, but spiritual.
        • Be patient!
          • It may take years for some to put their faith in Jesus. Are you patient enough to keep praying for them as long as it takes?
          • You may not always complete your agenda – that’s ok. Don’t force things!
        • Ask good questions.
          • What keeps you going? Etc. – helps to reveal what is missing in life and open the door for Jesus.
        • Let FCA and other parachurch orgs partner with parishes to cover more turf!
    • Public Service Announcements
      • DYYAM:
        • Sept 23 – Base Camp (training for youth ministry teams) at St. Pius
        • Oct 21 – Youth Contact at Mount deSales
          • 9am-12pm: Youth Contact
          • 12pm-3pm: NCYC Delegation Meeting
        • March for Life – only ONE venue for the Rally (only Verizon center), so we may have fewer tickets available.
      • APYM:
        • APYM website, collaboration with BACM, etc.
        • Resources in the archives for ideas on how to get out of your office!
    • Afternoon: Networking Groups on different “turfs”
      • Social Media
        • Focus on one social medium and do it well; consistency is key!
        • First 20 minutes in the office, decide what you will post that day.
        • Make use of cross posting tools and scheduling tools
        • Use of SignUp Genius
          • Ease of use
          • Designed to be shared on social media by those signing up
          • More kids/adults signing up
        • Instagram - Inspirational quotes; designate one teen to have access to post (emphasize diversity in posts); use “story” to give “real time” info
        • Twitter
          • Twittertimer – sending out 5x per day on time programmed in morning
        • Humanizing – pictures and tidbits from your own life
        • Snapchat doesn’t allow for transparency re: boundaries, but is where the teens are; “streaks” are important
        • “Remind” is a good service for utilizing texting, GroupMe also mentioned
        • Enewsletter tools – Mailchimp (free), Constant Contact, Flocknote, Smore
          • Many have built-in ability to post link to content straight to social media account(s)
        • Facebook – best for reaching adults, not teens. post 3x per week, example: Saint of the Day; can pre-set posts if using a “page” (as opposed to “group” or personal page)
        • Can “Check In” where you are (Also helpful for “Away from Desk”)
        • College idea – online small groups
        • How to market:
          • 1 month, 2 weeks, 2 days, day of…
        • Boundaries:
          • Follow back? No…
          • Follow a personal account? 18 & graduated

      • Schools
        • Assign teens looking to get into a deep role to an adult à teens o to adult w/ the “in”
        • Lunch w/ students in the schools
        • Have adults go to games and shows. Parish is reimbursing up to $50pp to attend.
        • Have shifts for regional YMS & volunteers – The 13th disciple
        • Have the county calendar available
        • Parish school/Catholic:
          • Faculty vs. 8th grade game
          • What helps teachers see selves as partners in evangelization?
          • Faculty payer on Friday / Monday praise/psalm – principal
            • Principal disciples staff disciples parents
          • Consistent theme (short, branding) across the board…parish, school, etc.
          • Summer programs at HS and colleges – faith programming should be part of this
            • Peer ministry (training, etc.)
            • HS VBS
            • Sharing witness
            • Planning your own service project
            • Bible study
            • Small group
        • Public school
          • Introduce self to admin/principal/guidance counselor
          • Just “be” w/ people, don’t focus on getting them to do/go somewhere
          • See you outside context of Church
        • General:
          • People w/in community that are also parishioners
            • Discipleship w/in existing context (plays, coaches)
            • Equip the “already there”
          • Be a chaplain for a team, esp. if you already know players
            • Obstacle: admin & coaches
          • Meet admin
          • Letter of support (like Howard County Youth Ministers’)
          • Mentoring
          • Buy “sports passes” – 1 for me, 1 for other adult
            • Individually set up times to go to, or won’t on own
            • Shows your investment in young people
            • Eventually felt comfortable going on own
            • They don’t know how long you were there, just that you showed up à be strategic (see parents, stand near kids, talk to admin)
      • Away From Your Desk
        • Hard if you work from home frequently – hard to leave desk when scheduled to be there
        • Be straightforward with where you are going
          • Meetings, professional
          • Meeting with teen, YA, volunteer
        • Feel restless when in office
        • Need to do more “go”
        • Offer self as tutor if able
        • COMMUNICATE!
          • # of hours – try to keep consistent hours and keep track of hours
          • Email to staff w/ where I am at beginning of month or week
        • Check in/brief face time with coworkers daily when at the office
        • Use a dropbox outside office
        • Can use social media to check in where you are (increases impact of presence)
        • Delegation, social networking for needs, train others to do the ministry away from the office (you have to at the office, but volunteers don’t)
        • Educate staff on what YM role is/about your ministry
        • Invite staff to pray for youth
        • Saying “no” is important!
        • One day a month to go and pray! Time for prayer AS work, praying about work (arrange w/ supervisor before counting prayer as work time)
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September 7, 2017

9/6/2017

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Material Resources/ Inspiration for "Getting on their turf"
Below are some resources from different youth ministry efforts to get out of the office. If you have more you'd like to add, please send to kerskine@stlouisparish.org. Thanks!
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